Finding a minibar in your hotel room is becoming rarer.
Even if you do, it’s often filled with just a few plastic cartons of long life milk which, let’s be honest, could probably be placed on a shelf in a sauna for a week in high summer and still not go off.
But in Las Vegas, the halcyon days of the minibar never ended.
On a recent trip, the little fridge that could was bulging. Yes, there was water and Coke but also six – SIX – varieties of beer. Not just wine but Veuve Clicquot champagne too. There was vodka, gin, three rums, Jack Daniels and a cinnamon infused whiskey. There was even an adorably bulbous half-sized bottle of Patron silver tequila.
On the counter above was an array of nuts, chips and chocolates.
But be warned, amid all this in room indulgence was eye-watering prices, steep fines for doing something many of us do quite regularly with minibars – and one wild find.
It’s an outlandish, blaring, neon-lit mecca that has more Circque de Soleil shows than days of the week. A place even naysayers often find themselves warming too. But the minibar – well, it was one of the Strip’s wilder adventures.
Wild find in hotel room
Nestled between the Fiji waters in the room, the can – daubed in pastel pink – looked incongruous enough. For days I assumed it was a sickly sweet can of some flavored water – raspberry and guava perhaps.
And then I looked more closely. The can said it was “concentrated,” but it wasn’t a concentred drink, it was “concentrated love”.
This was “Lovebox”. Within, the label explained, was: one “orgasmic, multi speed” vibrator, two “premium” condoms (none of those budget sheaths) and a personal lubricant.
It’s literally passion pop.
Frankly, good on this casino-cum-hotel for offering something more interesting in the room than a tiny bottle of water and stale M&Ms. Las Vegas is “Sin City” after all – so why not let your guests get down with some hardcore sinning and embrace the erotic?
What happens in Vegas, yada yada yada.
But what was actually wild – and outrageous – was the cost of said Lovebox.
This tin of temptation costs a passion-killing $50.
Purchasing those items separately would set you back less than $40. That’s including 10 – not two – condoms.
That things cost more in hotel minibars is hardly new. But the extent to which this happens in Las Vegas is so riotous it might make you grasp for a bottle of water to bring for yourself. That’s if the 1L bottle of water wasn’t $31, which is enough to make you pass out.
Compare that to Woolies, where a 1L Mount Franklin costs but $3.
$106 for alcoholic beverage smaller than a Coke
The rip off roll call went on. A small can of Bud Light beer: $17. Coke: $14. M&M’s: $21. Pringles: $21. A 375ml bottle of Chardonnay: $63. The half-size Veuve was $92.
That wasn’t even the most expensive item. That curvaceous bottle of Patron, which at 200ml was smaller than a can of soft drink, came in at $106 converted to Australian dollars.
Not that it was easy to find these prices. There was no printed sign next to the fridge warning that your wallet was going to be emptied quicker than at the roulette wheel several stories below. This information was instead buried on a page of the in-room television.
The cunning answer to the avarice, you might think, would be to head down to one of the casino’s many convenience stores, grab a beer, pop it in the fridge and enjoy later.
But no.
It’s said casinos don’t have visible clocks so punters – inside a hermetically sealed, temperature-controlled, windowless box – won’t know what time it is and so will keep betting.
Many casino stores, it seems, don’t have visible prices either. In the hope you’ll blindly pay anyway.
That Bud Light will still set you back $17.
Minibar rule that could cost you dearly
What about getting a beer from the shop down the road instead?
It’ll be cheaper at around $4 a can. But shockingly, you can be charged for an act many of us do with minibars quite regularly: placing something of your own inside.
It doesn’t matter if it’s beer from the shop, a water from the plane or even some milk.
The fridges have sensors. Take a product out and the cost of it will be automatically added to your bill. Add a product from elsewhere and $50 will be added to your bill, so says a sticker on the front of the fridge.
According to a 2019 article by the Las Vegas Review Journal this is nothing new and was done because some travelers were emptying the minibars completely and stuffing their own items inside, leading to wastage and extra staff costs.
The sensors not only charge you but also alert housekeeping that an item has to be restocked, saving them from checking each one manually.
Should you pick up a beer and then, shuddering in horror as you discover the cost, replace it – don’t dilly dally. In some cases removing an item for any longer than 45 seconds will see your credit card charged.
The hotels have a solution. Why not rent a fridge from them for your extras? It’s a mere $50. No, not for your entire stay, silly. It’s $50 per day.
To chill your $4 beer for 24 hours in a hotel minibar will cost you more than 10 times the cost of the actual beer.
At this point you may be so frustrated at inanimate objects in your room trying to hustle, including a tin of condoms and a vibrator, you that you might head out on the Strip for some relief.
But be warned. Rip offs await you there too. The slots and gaming tables for sure. These are just the most obvious.
However, you might be tempted by one of the chaps in the street who approach tourists offering a trip to a strip club, sometimes with free drinks and a VIP ride.
You may as well just hand them over your entire wallet, cards and PIN numbers. In Las Vegas, a night with a $70 “Lovebox” would be a cheaper option.