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'My friend wants me to remove my mole before her wedding - I refuse'

A woman who used to feel quite self-conscious about the mole on her right cheek has been left rather taken aback after her soon-to-be-wed pal made a rather unusual - and apparently mandatory - request. The 24-year-old woman in question had been looking forward to being a bridesmaid at her pal Zoe's wedding and has been busily helping her out with all-important planning duties.

Things took a turn recently however after Zoe took her out for coffee, without the other bridesmaids, and asked her whether she'd consider getting her mole removed before the wedding, explaining that she "wanted everyone to look good in the wedding photos as well as on the wedding day."

Taking to Reddit, the conflicted young woman wrote: "Zoe explained that she wanted everyone to look good in the wedding photos as well as on the wedding day (understandable) and that the mole on my face would be a distraction, and that I wouldn't look good in the photos. She said that she would pay for the surgery out of pocket, as she could afford it, and all I would have to do was go in and get it removed. I told her that I needed time to think about it. She said she understood, but let me know that it would be mandatory for me to have the procedure in order to be a bridesmaid. I said that I would get back to her."

After taking some time to reflect, she now isn't sure what she wants to do. According to the surprised bridesmaid, her mole is brown, and is "maybe about half a penny" in diameter. She used to cover it up with foundation and concealer but nowadays feels more comfortable heading out without a load of makeup. On the one hand, although she doesn't "100 per cent love" her mole, she is "slowly starting to embrace it", and isn't sure she'd want to go through such a procedure.

On the other hand, however, she wonders whether she would be happier in the long run without her mole, and furthermore wants to make sure Zoe has "the best day". Unsure, she's now turned to fellow Reddit users for their thoughts on the matter, where many have been left astonished that Zoe would make such a demand of someone she supposedly cares about.

One person commented: "I don't think your 'friend' is the friend you think she is. Someone who loves you for who are would NEVER ask you to permanently alter your body to conform to their personal standards of beauty and, even worse, to alter your body for an event that will be happening for just a few hours, during a singular day in your/their entire life. If you choose to remove the mole, do it because you want to. Otherwise, may I suggest the thing that you really need excised from your life is the bride."

Another agreed: "Any 'friend' who tells you 'you can't be in my wedding unless you get cosmetic surgery' isn't actually a good friend. That's a completely bananas level of entitlement. A good wedding photographer is going to touch up the photos anyway, and could just remove it that way, but, also, if your friend was actually your friend, she wouldn't even bring it up; everyone has skin marks like moles, acne scars, freckles, discolorations, etc. They're not a 'distraction' unless you're a petty shallow person. I know exactly what I'd tell any friend of mine who told me I had to get cosmetic surgery for their wedding, and I absolutely wouldn't be at that wedding."

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