Elizabeth Chambers is still healing after the shocking demise of her marriage to Armie Hammer.
Chambers, 40, and Hammer, 36, tied the knot in 2010 and together had two children, Harper, 8, and Ford, 6. In July 2020, Chambers filed for divorce, citing irreconcilable differences.
By the following year, Hammer was in hot water over allegations of sexual violence and cannibalistic fetishism by one of his former sexual partners. The disturbing revelations and subsequent backlash prompted the “Call Me By Your Name” actor to retreat from the spotlight, having also been dropped by his agent, publicist and other members of his team.
After the first accusation, multiple other women came forward to say they have been sexually insulted by Hammer over the years, including one who claimed he tied her up and told her he wanted to “break my rib and barbecue and eat it.”
Though Hammer has denied any wrongdoing and claimed all sexual encounters were sexual, Chambers was trying to put together her ex’s secret sex life in real time.
Now, Chambers is sharing what led to the demise of her decade-long marriage, and how she’s healing and making a name for herself.
“I was learning things as the public was,” the actress and TV personality told ELLE in a new interview. “I was like, ‘There are no words. What the f–k?’”
Chambers had accusers in her DMs asking questions about the situation, and eventually addressed the allegations in a February 2021 Instagram post saying she supports “any victim of assault or abuse.”
However, she still spends time with Hammer and supports him.
“I support Armie through his journey and I always will,” she said at the time. “All I’ve ever wanted is for him to be sober, healthy, and happy. And he is that. He’s really present when he’s with the kids, and that’s all I can hope for. All you want is for your children to have two solid parents, right? That’s always the goal, so anything I can do to support that, I will.”
The “Criminal Minds” actress defended her character against the man she married, insisting his actions aren’t representative of who she is.
“The last thing I ever want to do is let someone else’s actions, which have nothing to do with me, make me angry,” she continued in her plea for support. “It’s not going to help me, and it’s not going to help anyone around me.”
Chambers and Hammer met in 2007 in Los Angeles through a mutual friend, and though they bonded over their mutual Texas roots, not everyone in her life was so fond of their friendship.
“Armie was starting to get some publicity and recognition,” Chambers’s sister Catherine Chambers told ELLE. “My first instinct was [to tell Elizabeth to] be careful who you are trusting.”
Hammer proposed after nine months of dating. “They were the most in-love, perfect couple,” Chambers’s longtime friend Jenna Marshall Schuler told the magazine.
But the sparks seemed to fade over time — though Chambers isn’t sure exactly when their relationship took a downturn.
“Marriage is always going to be difficult, and, as with any relationship, you go through a process. Especially if you throw success and fame into the mix; it just becomes more magnified,” the BIRD Bakery founder and CEO shared. “[Over time] your partner is learning things about themselves. They’re growing, you’re growing; you hope that you’re growing together.”
Instead of growing together, the couple seemed to continue to grow apart.
Then, Hammer confessed to having an affair, which involved “consensual non-consent” role play — a sexual fantasy that involves sex scenes that can sometimes involve mimicking forms of rape. The couple sought out therapy with psychotherapist and relationship expert Esther Perel.
“[Esther] always said heartbreak is literally worse than a heroin addiction, and I think about that a lot,” Chambers said.
The final straw for Chambers happened during the pandemic when the whole family was quarantined together in the Cayman Islands. In an interview with British GQ, Hammer described the quarantine situation as “very complicated” and “intense,” saying he felt like a wolf “caught in a snare” that wanted to “chew off his own foot.”
According to Chambers, Hammer “was the worst” during this time. He decided to leave the family behind in the Cayman Islands while he returned to California to help a friend restore an old motel.
“My heart was broken in nine million pieces, and I still drove him to the airport,” Chambers admitted. “You can give, you can love, you can be there for someone, but you also need to hold people accountable for their actions.”
Hammer’s decision to leave her and the kids during lockdown solidified Chambers’ decision to file for divorce.
“The dissolution of my family was literally my biggest fear of my whole life,” she confessed. “You’re building something, right? You’re weaving a beautiful tapestry, and the last thing you want is for a knife to come and rip the tapestry in half.”
Chambers had a vision of her children being a mix of both her and Hammer and being a happy family. Now, she’ll do whatever it takes to protect her kids from the trauma inflicted by their father.
“Do I want my son to become this? Would I want my daughter to stay in a relationship like this?” Chambers ruminated. “Obviously this is all way too much for two children under eight. One day, I want them to be able to say, ‘I am independent of whatever has happened in generations before. I’m aware of it, but I am the person I am not because of where I came from.’”
Clear-eyed, the mom also knows they can’t pretend the past two years didn’t happen.
“Our parents and grandparents, and probably generations before that, taught us to brush things under the rug and pretend like everything is perfect. But that’s so uninteresting, and it’s so damaging. Like, no, we’re going to talk about it,” she said. “Nothing is perfect. And I’m really guilty of that. I always wanted the perfect Christmas card. I’m such a traditional person. I love family, and I love faith. But at the same time, what I think is really beautiful is that we’re all imperfect.”
