“Bachelor” alum Sarah Herron admits there is “no way to prepare” for pregnancy loss, one week after her baby boy, Oliver, tragically passed away.
“Postpartum after pregnancy loss is still postpartum,” the former reality star, 36, wrote on Saturday alongside a photo of herself on Instagram, in which she was in the bathroom wearing a tank top and an adult diaper.
“I hadn’t gotten to the chapters on perinatal care yet, or lactation support. I jumped from second trimester to fourth trimester overnight.”
The “Bachelor in Paradise” alum went on to reveal her days had been “spent taking a crash course in postpartum relief through streaming tears.”
“I don’t want relief, I want my baby,” she added.
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Heron continued, “Since coming home without Oliver, everything has been a haunting reminder of what was supposed to be, and what I now must face without him here.
“There is simply no way to prepare yourself for the subtle inconveniences of pregnancy that can suddenly without warning, vanish.”
Herron and her fiancé Dylan Brown, who proposed in May 2021, announced they were expecting last September, after going through IVF.
The influencer documented her pregnancy journey over the following months, and noted Saturday she was now struggling with no longer having a bump.
Oliver, the couple’s “IVF miracle” baby, passed away on Jan. 28 at 24 weeks old.
Herron wrote on Instagram, “Like suddenly being able to zip your winter coat, or reach down to tie your shoes again. Or the way the elastic band on your sweats suddenly fits ON your waist – not below it … And worst of all, catching your new reflection each day and no longer seeing a bump.”
“The things that were ‘off limits’ during pregnancy are suddenly allowed again and it feels jarringly wrong,” she added. “Even considering a turkey sandwich or a glass of wine (things I longed for during pregnancy) feels like deep abandonment of my baby.”
Herron concluded the heartbreaking post by urging her followers to show up for their friends who may be experiencing a similar loss.
“I never prepared for this, and no mother should have to. I understand why no doctor or book briefs you on the possibility of this torture & I don’t have a positive way to wrap this post up,” she wrote.
“My wish is that if you have a friend who lets you in on her loss, show up to her bathroom with pads, diapers, and ice packs so that she doesn’t have to figure it out alone. Fill her fridge with broths, casseroles and beverage options so she doesn’t have to think about the mundane yet painful decisions in front of her.”
