South Africa

NDUMISO NGCOBO | Oh Lord, save me from the seven-hour service

Humour

I've never understood the appeal of dressing up and sitting in a church, hall or marquee, listening to speeches on special occasions. Luckily, there's a way out

The other day I overheard the lady who does our laundry talking to her cousin on the phone. Apparently, she was going to an 8am church service that Sunday but, in her words, "I'll make sure to sit by the entrance so that I can duck around 3pm." Huh?

I so badly wanted to interrupt her phone call to ask: "If you're ducking after seven hours, how long is this service?" or "Do you people not worry that the Lord loses interest around noon and that you're all just talking to yourselves by 3pm?"..

Football news:

Barcelona did not take Morib to the training camp in Germany. The parties cannot agree on a contract
Bayern and Dortmund were Interested in the possibility of transferring Chiesa. Juve refused
Fantastic story of a surfer from Australia: he won bronze after a severe skull injury (he couldn't even walk)
Aguero underwent a course of stem cell treatment to restore the cartilage of the knee joint
Mills on Varane at Manchester United: I'm not sure that he will be like van Dijk or Dias. There are 6 difficult matches in La Liga, not counting the Champions League
Memphis Depay: I don't care if they call me a rebel. Suarez won a lot not because he is the nicest person on the field
Barca will not have to register Messi as a newcomer. He will be able to work at the training camp without signing a contract